- Selfish
- Offensive
- Unaccommodating
- Nasty
- Malicious
Sometimes when I would try to describe the word mean to my Spanish speaking friends I would merely say, "The opposite of kind."
I do not claim to be the kindest person in the world. There are times when I can be very mean, most especially to those closest to me. But I have noticed lately an ever increasing amount of meanness all around me, mostly on the internet.
It's like the comments that come from behind computer screens have no need for any kind of decorum. People allow their freedom of speech, ideas, and opinions to override any type of civility, decency, or kindness.
This unbridled "mean" culture we have created from behind the monitors has leaked out to other parts of our daily lives. Like many other people, my husband and I work in call centers. The phone is another great barrier that allows us to wildly unleash our frustrations on total strangers. Anyone who has worked in a call center can attest to that.
In fact, probably anyone who has ever worked in customer service can attest that some people are just downright mean. And increasingly so.
Nowadays, being mean is celebrated. It supposedly indicates strength, courage, and even intelligence. It shows up in songs, movies, and TV shows. It's funny. Though "bullying" is openly condemned by many, it is applauded and laughed at constantly.
Just because you are eloquently mean does not negate the fact that you are being mean. Don't get me wrong, speaking or writing in an educated manner is wonderful, but not when it is meant to intentionally belittle another person.
In a day when controversies and confrontations infiltrate every corner of our lives, it's easy to get caught up in the idea that if you don't speak as loud as you can you won't be heard. That leads to both sides of a debate screaming as loudly as they can at each other. I watched a news clip the other day about Obamacare and the government shutdown. I saw a news anchor and a congressman talk AT each other, rather than TO each other, as both tried to shove as many words down each other's throats as was humanly possible. I don't care what your position on Obamacare or any other issue is for that matter. It does not excuse you from common human decency.
People are so angry. There is a lot of injustice out there, and perhaps they think that if they are not angry, nothing will get done. I would like to propose that there is another way.
You can be heard without yelling. You can disagree without diminishing and depreciating. You can have conviction without constantly criticizing. You can make a difference without being mean. By all means, state your opinions. Let the world know them. But don't be surprised when not everyone agrees with you. Try to see things from another's point of view. It doesn't mean that you have to agree with them, but you should respect them enough as a fellow human being to not trample them with unkindness. And that means EVERYONE. None of this archaic--They are not like me, so they are not human--fiddle faddle. The president is a human being. Congressmen are human beings. Criminals are human beings. You and I and all those perfectly flawed people around you are human beings. And as such, they deserve a little respect and kindness, and heck, maybe even love.
Please continue to discuss and debate, comment and critique. But this time try not to be so mean.
